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Why must the Monkey subject poor Timmy to the horrors of his variegated fluids? The gods themselves, they do not know.
Why must the Monkey subject poor Timmy to the horrors of his variegated fluids? The gods themselves, they do not know.
12 comments:
You are a very clever man, Mr Addison.
The first in a rash of reverse kidnappings.
"Oi! Pay up guv'nor or we'll leave the little bastard roight 'ere!"
The Siamese twins liked to call themselves Mary and Jane, but in reality they shared a little dick.
Timmy never liked playing "house" with his big sister Debbie and her friend Janey. It was always the same. First they'd play "doctor", and Timmy would be the "patient". Then the girls would go off behind the garage with a turkey baster, giggling. Then they'd dump him in the house and say he couldn't play with them any more. Then they'd steal his GI Joe. Through his tears, Timmy wished that, just once, they'd let him play one of their other fun games, like that secret one called "L-7".
Heidi Shickelgruber beamed with pride at her two daughters, as they brought another subject for her mad experiments. But then they knew the penalty for disobeying her. Hadn't she learned all there was to know about inflicting pain in the concentration camps?
The girls glanced with nervous fear at the coal scuttle in the corner.
"Yes my prettys. Mr Lippy will have to do without his "entertainment" today"
"Glove puppet my ass", said Timmy.
All I want to know is what the hell that thing behind the door is? A baby Dalek? Or it sort of looks like the planet eater from Star Trek.
"Where's your crew"
"They're on the third planet."
"There is no third planet, Matt."
"Don't you think I know that?!!"
Anyway, maybe the girls are the baby planet-eating Dalek's high priestesses and they've just acquired their next sacrifice.
Oh youth! 'Tis but a coal scuttle.
Damit Abigail, if you're going to keep having these unwanted pregnancies, call me as soon it's born not years later. You know how hard it is to get them into the incinerator once they get to the terrible twos.
"That was super awesome Tammy!" shrieked Samantha as they hefted Simon back into the house.
"Maximum fun!" agreed Tammy "Mum's is going to go completely spaz when she sees our totally boss tattoo homage to the John Waters/Johnny Depp 1990 cult classic, Cry baby".
"She might wig out a bit if Simon doesn't wake up from the Valium anesthetic you gave him"
"Yeah, there is that".
It was one of those cruel ironies of life, that Timmy was not yet ready to appreciate being kidnapped by two schoolgirls and forced to perform improper acts on them. That wouldn't happen until he was in his forties... Ah cruel, cruel irony!
"No! Stop! I want to live!"
Little Jared wouldn't shut up, but that was fine. The girls knew Gay-Orochi preferred his virgin sacrifices to be vocal about their unwillingness.
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